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At the library where I work, there is a poor guy who sits at a computer looking up porn. Whenever I walk past with my little trolley of books he does a frantic switch from porn to some legitimate type thing... so I get my jollies from deliberately walking past to freak him out. I'm so cruel. But it's so funny.

Well, been quite a while since I've posted. I guess an update is in order. The money situation isn't any better, but then the Rookwood show came and went. I worked out a deal woth my (step-) mom, and I was going to do work for her to pay for it. The "forth of our party" had to bow out due to her step-uncle's funeral. *:(* Regardless, the trip is still there, but we just don't know when.

Right now I'm in the process of creating an ad for our store (owned by mom and pop of course.) So far (...)

Ah where to start. Time to start spilling out my guts again, it's been a little while.

Two days ago, on Saturday, January the 17, I stayed home all day. I didn't hear from my best friend David at all the entire day, and he usually calls me when he wakes up or soon after. He's not allowed to go anywhere and I knew his parents weren't home to keep him off the phone, so I found it odd. I called and left a message, but didn't hear from him that night until about 10.

He told me that he had (...)

Panicked and futile thoughts about what I will do after graduation have been invading my mind more and more often as I am getting closer and closer to matriculating from college. Perhaps I wouldn't be worrying about it so much if I had tried harder to make better grades but as it stands, I have a horrible GPA in a horribly useless major (Japanese) and now it's all coming back to haunt me. What will I do after college? Who will want to give a guy like with no skills a job?

At first, I (...)

Where is the delete button? Haha!

I need to get some stuff out before it eats me alive, I really can’t really let any of my friends know what I’m really feeling, I can only pretend around them, covering up my pain with fake smiles and laughs. “Pretending to be okay” sum it up pretty good, it’s what my counselor says I do to much of, but she don’t understand why I do it.

It is embarrassing, that once happy go lucky girl, filled with smiles and joy has now hit rock bottom, I have finally fallen. I was supposed to be the (...)


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