Mindy's journal

April 5,2003 1:51AM
ERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR. I am mad, and irrated. Parents can be such big fat butts sometimes. I was with Mark tonight cause he had surgery today...and I got to take care of him, I love taking care of him, he is so sweet. Anywayz my stupid parents make me come home in the middle of this rain storm when we have a tornado watch or whatever. How stupid is that. ERR and now my parents are on my case about going to bed. "Its too late"... "Go to bed now"... "We can't sleep while your on the computer", whatever dude, shove it. I got to watch part of the movie SIMONE it is a pretty good movie, it caught my attention anywayz. I was watching it with Nikol, Mark, and Josh, they are great people to hang with. Ok well I guess I better get off the computer before my parents have heart attacks or somthing. Lata.
~Mindy~ <><

April 4,2003 10:03PM
Tonight has been a wonderful night. I have gotten to spend the entire night with Mark...how much better can life get. Hehe. I am watching George of the Jungle on Disney Channel with Nikol and Mark. Mark had his surgery this morning and I am enjoying being able to take care of him for a change. Hmmmmm.....what to write. Hehe at the moment my mind is kind of preoccupied. Lol, Nikol just made me think of this kid I used to know from high school named Jay and whenever he sat down his butt crack would show. Ok well anywayaz I gotta go and take care of the love of my life. Lata.
Mindy <><

April 3, 2003 11:12PM
I am stressed I think. Lol, don't ask me how I am not sure but at the moment I am so many things that stressed very well could be one of them. I hae so much to do and I never do it. That is my main problem. I get behind and then I can never catch up. I think that is what makes school so hard, is that it doesn't work very well with life. You either have to make school your life or die trying to keep up with all the work. I watched CSI and Without a Trace tonight both were really depressing, so instead of cheering me up and helping me relax and feel better it made me feel worse. See at the moment I am trying to convince myself to be happy, to enjoy life, to realize how much I have and be grateful. But it is not as easy as it sounds. Man, my mom is on the phone with me right now, and I thought the call was going to be Mark. So here I answer the phone all happy. Altho I guess I should be happy to talk to my Mom. I feel bad lately because in some ways she is so much better and overall she is just trying to make me happy but I don't make it easy for her. Altho that is the story with alot of people in my life right now. The people who care about me and love me just want me to be happy, butI sure dont' make it easy. This is totally off subject but this just popped into my head I don't know where it came from. Lol. But tonight my boss Jan kept telling me over and over what pretty hands I had. I had no clue why she kept saying it, I know she was trying to compliment me but it was just strange. And then there were two other students working with me tonight and she kept saying to them doesn't Mindy have pretty hands? The one guy I can't remember his name but he was funny he made fun of Jan for saying it so much. Jan finally got the hint and quit saying it. I mean it was just a weird thing afterawhile. Another thing that just popped into my head is that song "I'm so sick of being lonley" lately it seems to be in my head alot. Why I don't know cause really I shouldn't be lonley. I have a boyfriend, friends, family there is no reason I should be lonley. I have so much compared to some people out there. This is kind of a funny thought: Why is it that the people who always seem to have it all in the world, who seem to be on top, the ones who have so much when so many have so little, tend to be unhappy. I think I am one of those people, I am so lucky, I have so much compared to so many, and so therefore shouldn't I be happy? I mean I am not unhappy all the time but it sometimes disturbs me that I get unhappy when I shouldn't be. I know that comment made no sense, but that I guess is just be babbling away. It feels good to journal this all down. It is nice to get your thoughts and feelings out there. Man this is a long post. Hehe. I give alot of credit to whoever reads through this all. Oh something else eventful that happened tonight, and it should come as no suprise but Brandi stood me up for dinner tonight. She was like oh lets do dinner together tonight and I was like ok. And she never called to cancel or anything just didn't knock on my door. Oh well, not a suprise. Ok well I guess I should go and do all I need to do. One more thought to throw out there. Mark. He is having surgery tomorrow and I hope everything goes well. I have a feeling he is going to be more disabled tomorrow then he thinks he will be but I really do hope and pray that this is one of those times where he is right and I am really wrong. I love him and I hate to think of him in any kind of pain or discomfort. So I throw this prayer out too in my post for the evening:
Dear God,
Please be with Mark tomorow as he has his surgery. Protect him and comfort him.
Amen.
Hopefully I can still accomplish some stuff this evening before I have to call it a night. Until I post again. Lata.
~Mindy~ <><

April 3,2003 9:32PM
Well tonight has been an intersting night, I guess. At the moment I am in a really crappy mood, which is nothing new for me. I guess overall today has just been a very frusterating day. It is kind of funny cause it seems as though the days when I have nothing to do are they days that turn out the worst. Work was long, and I didn't get many donations which always stinks. Why is it that I feel alone sometimes? I am not alone and yet at times I feel so lonley. I went to McDonalds after work tonight because I had not gotten a chance to eat dinner. As I was walking back into my dorm I dropped my food and my drink. My drink flew all over the place, talk about a mess. So here I had spent the little bit of money I have and I wasted it for the ground. At the moment I am trying to watch CSI but I didn't get to watch it from the begining so it is kind of confusing. Oh well life goes on I guess. Lata I suppose.
Mindy

April 3,2003 2:47AM
It is 2:47 in the morning and I had a awsome night. Gosh the Lord is good to me. It always amazes me how He takes care of me. I got to do some unexpected things tonight which is always a plus. And I got to laugh and smile, and just have a really nice evening. I watched SwimFAn tonight, it is an ok movie, it actually wasn't as bad as I expected it to be. If this entry is a little confusing I apologize but I am pretty tired and out of it, but I just had to record how great my night has been. Work was interesting as usual, I work as a caller for the Alumni house, trying to get people to donate money. This evening as I was calling alumni, one of the people I called was deceased already and her husband asked me if I would put it in her file that she had died on such and such a date. I felt so bad here I was calling for money and he had lost his wife. I didn't know what to say...it was awful. Now switching topics totally. LOL. Have I metioned yet in this entry how special Mark is to me? Man, I can't belive how much I love him! He is just soo amazing. Anyway before I blabber anymore I will end with this: LIFE IS AMAZING EVERYONE SHOULD LIVE IT TO THE FULLEST WITH NO REGRETS. Love you all. God bless. Lata.
~Mindy~ <><

April 2, 2003 7:04PM
I am just about to run off to work and I feel exhausted as though the day should already be over with. The good news is I have no school tomorrow so hopefully I will find the time to get all my homework done that I have. Three more weeks and then school will be done with only for me to start my next semester of classes. Oh what fun. I had this massive Psy test today which I know I didn't do that well on, I should have studied more. Today was such a beautiful day, I love this weather. Mark is the best he worked on my web page today and did awsome things to it. Check it out if you find the time. I love Mark so much he is so good to me. Well off to work I go and need to pay off my debts somehow. And I know ... I need to save my money not spend it. That is what Mark is always telling me. Hehe...and I will tell you a secret he is right. I don't like to admit it but he normally is. Something to never forget:God is soo good, He is always there no matter what. I know I can depend on Him in all my times of need. Friends are also great blessings, sometimes in disguise. I am so grateful for all I have. I am one lucky girl. Lata.
~Mindy~ <><