kaizley's journal

Remember?

90% | 6

# 33028

Remember the time , a while ago now when life was fun and care free and all that mattered was what as there. There were no complicated plot lines, everything was fed to you in black and white. There were only toys, parents and the occasional monster in the closet, all concocted by the imagination. The biggest worries were nap time and bath time. Things you never used to want, but now they are things you can't live without. Just one more hour of sleep and a nice hot bath to relax.

A young mind is yet to be corrupted by the horrific world around them. They are safe in their world of pre-school, day care and day time tv. Their only concept of the outside world that they obtain is that of which they make up. Games that are often entitiled "mothers and fathers" or "doctors" or "school". They imitate what they have observed from the few people and scenarios they have come across.

Now if one was to make up one of these games, it would have something to do with something that is often not experiences. Whatever. I kno thye wouldn't have anything to do with hospital check ups, school exams and most of all.. MARRIAGE (hehe).

When was that transition from care free, energetic, imaginative, daring, unafraid, undetered. hen did I change to up tight, angsty, depressive, drug abusive, rebelious and stressed out?

Dreamboat Watching

56% | 2

# 32477

Today is maybe one of the most fabulously mixed up days of my life.

In the morning when my mother picked me up, she didn't seem too happy to see me, and I smelt a bit, but that was soon fixed when I hopped into the shower. Anyway, The day went on, mum went out for a minute while I sat and wasted some time.

Then some other boring stuff happened, until mum said she was going gocery shopping. Me being who I am decided that I wanted to join her. In regular fashion we went to the fruit shop and looked at the mangoes for a while, then made a detour to one of the ugliest clothing shops I had ever seen. Bright yellow and bright pink garments covered with countless numbers of sequins *shudders*. Oh! And the most hideous pair of white, three-quarter pants with big red and yellow flowers plastered all over them.

Anyway, back to my point. As we were leaving the fugliest shop in the world, I saw him. At least I think it was him. MY DREAM BOAT! :D. The guy I had met a whole entire more than two years ago, and I haven't seemed to forget about it. I mean, so I didn't mutter a word to him.. but I gave him a dirty and I've seen him without a shirt! So that's gotta count to something.

As mum dragged me a long to the supermarket, I stood behind him on the escalator and just stared at him. Wow.. Wouldn't it have been cool if it really was my dream boat? I'm hoping it was. Hoping A LOT.

*sigh*

*shrivels into a big, unmovable blob*

I wonder if the laundry has been done...

The Challenge

56% | 6

# 32240

I have been challenged (mostly by my self) to reach the maximum posts that I am allowed for the day. As far as I can remember, that's about 70.. but I'll check just to make sure. Yes, it's 70.

Now I have I think 3 down, and only 67 to go... maybe I should save this challenge till when I have more time...

Hypocrites..

60% | 2

# 31753

Why is it that people who tell you to do things don't do it themselves? Why is it that particular people tell me to do something, something in which I need particular help with and they just shrug it off! She tells me to ask her for help and when I do, she tells me to go and do it myself.

I have to perform an experiment on people for biology and I asked her if she could do it for me and she said yes. Just now I asked her if she could do it now, you know to get it done and she started complaining that she didn't want to because I would need her to sit still, and she doesn't want to sit still blah blah blah.

This isn't helping! Why is it so hard to stop what you're doing for a couple of hours to help your significant others in order for them to pass their final year of school. She keeps telling me to get stuff done, but by doing this, she isn't letting me get it done. IT'S NOT FAIR!

If you have read some of my other posts, you might know who I'm talking about.

My Brain is Disintegrating

69% | 3

# 31497

My brain, is very very gradually turning into summer holiday - too much television and not enough work - mush. Seriously, I am having a large amount of trouble in spelling the word "research". I keep adding an "a" where there shouldn't be an "a" (reasearch). I realise that I am making this mistake, but for some reason I keep doing it!

So, I have given up and declared that now the word "reasearch" is spelt with two "a"s.

I have finally realised how much my in-productivity is dragging me down and will most probably end up in a failing grade. This is definately not the best thing to encounter, as I would probably get kicked out of the house and become a poor little hobo living on scraps from the garbage. So in order to NOT become a poor little hobo on the streets, I think that it's probably about time to pull my (I can't think of the word) socks up and get cracking.

At least the timetables that I have been writing out everyday have started to be used, at least for an hour or two, but by my first break I begin to forget what I was actually supposed to be doing... not the best thing to happen.

The best way, I find to procrastinate is obsession. I obsess to kill the time. Music, midday movies, Oprah, The O.C, jigsaw puzzles, planning, organiing, even cleaning, the most random things can keep me occupied for hours, while I've decided that I don't want to be doing work. So I have now decided that I will not be at my post (the computer) for most of the day. Because of the red - eyeness and blinding (not literally) headaches that can occur from staring at the compuer screen for 8 hours a day, I have decided that no more than an hour can be spent here, on the computer.

The year 12 advice book said that us HSC do-ers need to get out and about and do some physical work! Instead of sitting on our bums ll day (which I'm very very good at).

Considering I've been here for a lot more than an hour, I'll have to start tomorrow. Oh well.

See you all later, once I've finished school (if ever).

Guardian Angels

?% | 1

# 31197

After all the trouble at home and at school (mostly home) I got to thinking about guardian angels, or angels in general. I've been hoping for a while that an angel would come down and look after me, but I'm not sure about how much this said angel is actually helping. I do believe that there are spirits all around, but I'm not too sure if these spirits are completely angelic.

I found an article about finding and talking to your guardian angel. I don't know where I'm going with this... so I'll stop now.

See you all later.


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