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Dec 27, 2003 04:22 # 18402
Well now that the mass hysteria which is the holiday season has all but quieted down, it's so much easier for people in general to find the good things about their life. And it is even easier to pick your life and yourself apart until you consist of only flaws and little bloody pieces of depression.
I have not seen my fiancee, the one and only person I have ever loved, in four months. I have been engaged to him for six and have only seen him since then once, for a grand total of about ten hours. Because of my unique position, I can do nothing to see him. And because he is needed more somewhere else than with me, he can not see me, either. It is so easy for me to blame this all on myself; I am just not good enough, or on fate (or God, if you prefer; I myself do not believe in God in the general sense); They fucked me over grandly. But alas, instead I revel in these simple facts: He is going to be with me agian as soon as we are able to manage it. I would wait forever, with pleasure, to be held by him. Another fact would be that meanwhile, I can talk to him over the phone for almost as long as I so desire... and online as well. And meanwhile, I do have a wonderful family, albeit their many... well, quirks.
I am going to guess at lease some of you know the line Linus from the Peanuts says in their Christmas special:
'And lo, I bring you tidings of great joy...'
And then at the end of his grand speech:
'And that's what Christmas is all about, Charlie Brown.'
Well, this is what love is all about. It has it's highs and lows. But for better or for worse, it is always worth it.
'Its better to have loved and lost, then never to have loved at all.'
I'm very handy with a meat-cleaver, ~Arei Drea
This post was edited by Arei_Drea on Dec 27, 2003.