Reading What Rules

Aug 19, 2004 17:39 # 25641

Wednesdays_Child *** smiles...

Meeting new people

100% | 6

The other day an fellow student of mine was going out with a bunch of friends and invited me at the last minute. I was dubious about going, but went anyway. To my surprise? I had a great time. The people were friendly, the food was great, the conversation was lively and engaging, and I never once was made to feel invasive or uncomfortable among all these people I had met for the first time that eveing.

It's times like this that I think I live in a pretty great place. Lately, I've met so many people who were mean, or rude, or boring, that I'd forgotten how much fun it could be to meet a bunch of new people who are just these vast depositories of new topics, jokes you've never heard, and ideas you've never thought. Old friends who you've known forever are great, kind of like comfortable warm sweaters. Broken in, as it were. But meeting new people is like finding the perfect new dress that is totally unlike anything else in your closet, but that you look great in. (And yes, I am abusing this simile, but still.)

So yeah, I'm kind of sad I met all these great new people right before moving, but it gives me hope that I'll met some more great new people at my new school as well. Plus? I'll have the great old friends as well. So yeah, I'm feeling pretty good about things right now.

"She's at that awkward age. Too old for romantic misadventures, too young for mystic kung fu powers.

Aug 19, 2004 23:28 # 25646

r_pendragon *** replies...

Re: Meeting new people

93% | 2

The people were friendly, the food was great, the conversation was lively and engaging, and I never once was made to feel invasive or uncomfortable among all these people I had met for the first time that evening.

Sounds like a lot of fun; I love dinner parties like that. It's always nice to encounter a group of friends that can put away their in-jokes for an evening and still engage in clever and entertaining witty repartee.

Old friends who you've known forever are great, kind of like comfortable warm sweaters.

I'm a comfortable warm sweater? Golly gee, lucky me. It's good to know you rate me with such a sexy fashion item, it makes me feel all warm and fuzzy and loved.

Seriously, Ari-chan, how did you end up at NAO? Reading your posts, I was pretty sure it was you, but your website in your user profile cinched it.

Looking forward to seeing you at Ueno Station in 10 days!

-Rach

Aug 20, 2004 00:32 # 25647

Wednesdays_Child *** replies...

Re: Meeting new people

60% | 2

I'm a comfortable warm sweater? Golly gee, lucky me. It's good to know you rate me with such a sexy fashion item, it makes me feel all warm and fuzzy and loved.

Err... Made out of only the most expensive, high quality, fuzzy yarn that would shed all over when you knit with it? *sheepish look* Sexy and sassy sweater? Perhaps in lime green?

Seriously, Ari-chan, how did you end up at NAO? Reading your posts, I was pretty sure it was you, but your website in your user profile cinched it.

Good to know my writing style is recognizable? In all honesty, I followed some link one day and then was all "_This_ is where Rachel posts regularly! I finally found it!"

And then stayed. ^_^

--Amanda

"She's at that awkward age. Too old for romantic misadventures, too young for mystic kung fu powers.

Aug 20, 2004 14:28 # 25657

r_pendragon *** replies...

Re: Meeting new people

?% | 1

Good to know my writing style is recognizable?

It's funny... I'd read a few of your posts before and hadn't really had any worthwhile response to make, just more of a "huh, guess she and I probably don't have much in common." (Which goes to show how, even when you're good friends, there can be a lot you don't know about one another, hmm?)

So this morning I was skimming the "Little Monsters" thread, and I read your post about your mother having a daycare and you not wanting kids and the like, and I said to Cal, "My god, never before have I seen a post that reminds me so much of Amanda– listen–" and I read it to her.

Her response being much laughter and then, "Gah, that does sound exactly like Amanda." Especially with the *amused*s and the ^_^s and the _underscores_.

And then I read your profile. Shinigamihigh.net, huh? "Ah, that would be because it is Amanda."

Can't believe you registered in July and didn't tell me... now I have to go and edit all the posts I've written that say horrible things about you. ;)

The internet is truly a strange, strange place... I wonder if anyone else has had this happen...

Perhaps in lime green?

My J. Crew gene screams in rebellion. Lime green is very mid-nineties. How about a nice soft baby blue?

Aug 20, 2004 18:51 # 25660

Wednesdays_Child *** replies...

Re: Meeting new people

?% | 1

Can't believe you registered in July and didn't tell me...

Heh. To be honest? I didn't want you to feel crowded. Or conversly, stalked. ^_^ So I made a point of trying not to bug you. Though I was _very_ tempted to reply to the comment about the vaccum packed squid. *amused*

Which goes to show how, even when you're good friends, there can be a lot you don't know about one another, hmm?

Well, to be fair there _is_ a lot we don't have in common. I guess it just took this long to find a post we both read and felt strongly enough about to reply to. ^_^ After all, I don't really read the current events forms, and nothing horribly funny has happened to me lately. ^_^

But now that you know I'm here, perhaps I shall post you occasionally.

"She's at that awkward age. Too old for romantic misadventures, too young for mystic kung fu powers.

Oct 18, 2004 19:47 # 27907

Alexis * wants to note...

Re: Meeting new people

60% | 2

That's so great. I'm usually kind of cautious when i meet new people too. I'm glad that you are approaching this move in the view of meeting new friends and always having the old ones too. I wish you the best with your new life.

Good friends'll bail you out of jail.Best friends'll be sittin with you sayin;'Damn, we f*cked up'.

This post was edited by Alexis on Oct 18, 2004.

Jan 22, 2005 02:54 # 31735

ReallyCoolDude *** wants to note...

Re: Meeting new people

98% | 3

Old friends who you've known forever are great, kind of like comfortable warm sweaters. But meeting new people is like finding the perfect new dress that is totally unlike anything else in your closet, but that you look great in.

Very aptly put! But, I still have apprehensions. Not only am I dead afraid to meet new people in real life, I am even afraid to *talk* to old-friends over phone. My social life is a zilch. My wife does all the talking over the phone. I get goosebumps even thinking about holding the phone in my hands, let alone go out and meet people! I hate parties/social gatherings, I try to sit on my couch most of the time or spend time with my family, and that's it. I can't even talk to my relatives who are of my age. I love watching movies, so most of the time I will be all alone in a theatre, I don't need any company to enjoy a particular movie.

Was I always like this? Let me try to recall...well, yes, as far as I can remember! I have never had any friends. The only best friend I have had, had to try for over a year or two before I gave up my outer shield and let him in my life. He adores me, and I am glad that he is my friend. I can talk to him for hours, and I sometimes wonder why did he persist to be my friend in the first place?

I must confess, my wife has a tough time with me. She is outspoken, and she likes being around people. I am her exact opposite when it comes to people, and I am surprised that she still loves me in spite of my ebola-virus-protection-shield that I keep around me always.

So, yes, coming back to the topic, your post is impressive, but no, thanks, I am still not convinced on whether meeting new people is a nice idea. It's still a terrifying thought!

Love is blind, but marriage is a real eye opener.

Jan 22, 2005 05:54 # 31738

majic *** throws in his two cents...

Re: Meeting new people

74% | 2

RCD, we are twins... How did we get separated at birth? I am almost a carbon copy of you. My wife is also the very outspoken one who has tons of friends and loves socializing with them. I don't go out to meet people my age. It's a bit terrifying and plus I have things I want to do. Things that keep me content. Friends??? What is that??? My life is too busy for friends. Well I take that back, I do have one friend.

Talking on the phone... nah, gimme email or IM and I'll talk your leg off. I hate talking on the phone, it's so awkward talking to new people. I get anxiety about it and can't even think straight. I feel way less intimidated using IM or email.

And another reason why I don't have more than one friend is I can't find anybody my equal. I don't say that as though I am better than anyone else. I say that in terms that I cannot find anyone that can entertain me on the intellectual level that I am on. I have my agenda in life and I am on a course and I just can't be bothered with *real* friends that have no idea who I am, what I like and am here to do.

I find socializing on the net to be less intrusive. I can do it at my own time span and I can turn it off when I get bored. No questions asked, no strings attached. Nobodies feelings are hurt, no emotional breakdowns.

RCD, I'm glad you posted that! You got me to thinking!!!

Jan 22, 2005 11:19 # 31746

andromacha *** agrees...

Re: Meeting new people

100% | 3

Somehow I can understand your feelings RCD. I am similar to you in a way. I have a best friend I've known forever (since we were both 5, so that makes it almost 17 years) and I can talk to her about anything.

Probably if I were your age I would be exactly your carbon copy, because once you have your own life with wife (well in my case husband) and kids it is also even harder to have a "social life" and find enough time for the family and the friends and work...

Though, being about 22, I still go to the university, and there I am sort of "forced" to socialize. I don't have many friends; just two or three girls I hang out with while we wait in between our classes (they take basically all the same courses I take, and so when I have a hole in the schedule so do they, and we go to a bar for a coffee or something).

That's about it though. I mean, I talk to them on the phone if we need to see each other for notes or books or whatnot, and sometimes it happens that we go out for a pizza (something like once every three months if not more rarely), but I do not feel the desire of always be around them and hang out more than what I am already doing when I am at the university. It's not that they are bad girls, or that I don't consider them at my level... it's just that they are very different from me. Lately I even found out that one of them loves to party and stuff (which was a side of her that I totally ignored - just to demonstrate how much I know them), and sometimes she asks me if I want to go with her, but I always refuse.

The truth is that I don't like to hang out! I don't like to go out with these "friends" and have "quality time" with them. Different thing is if I am with my best friend or Hawkeye. Then, yes, I do love to go out, maybe have a beer or something, but NEVER EVER going to the disco or to dance. That is something that I hate (not considering that I am similar to a broomstick as far as that is concerned), and you'll never find me in a disco or in places where crowds of young people love to be.

Sometimes I find myself wondering if there is something wrong with me, but hey that's what I am. I don't like being in crowded places, I feel awkward when I have to spend "quality time" with people I don't know or I am not well acquantained with, and I don't think that it is something I am going to change.

When such people call me on the phone, I do have a hard time in talking to them... I never know what to say or what to reply them, and I feel generally uncomfortable. So I do understand where you are coming from. Thank you for posting such a thing, because you know, sometimes I even wonder if I am the only "strange" person who feels like that, or if I am crazy or whatnot, or if there are also other people who feel the same way I do. Now, this has reassured me I can tell you! :)

Italy no longer accepts illegal immigrants. Mr. B sink their boats!!!!!!!


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