Reading Babygirls_Babydolls's journal

How can I discredit him or cause him any more harm? What could I do more devasting to his future? Than what he has done to himself?? I don't guess it would hurt to say His name..His name is Lewis Edward Turner age 24. It has been 2 years and 10 mnths since he did that crime, and killed that precious baby I called mine!! I don't hate the guy or hold a grudge on him.. Its kinda weird I feel called to him.. For 2 years and 6 mnths I have prayed that he would recieve Jesus Christ as his Lord and saviour and be forgiven his sins.. I hate the sin he did the death he caused but its not him I hate though I can't say I am not disappointed and upset with him though.. For as long as I have prayed for Lewis. I have felt as if God has called me to visit him in jail. I am scared to really I am. What would I say? How would I act? Would I curse him out?? Would I cry?? Would I make a fool of myself?? So, I decided to write him a letter.. For 6 months I have pondered what I would write. How could I make my letter touch his heart? I really honestly don't know what I could do or say to him.. Would I say look here you stupid dumb ass your headed straight for hell? Would I say LEWIS why the hell did you do it? Would it really even matter i began wondering one night.. Would it matter to him what I would have to say? I mean he has life behind bars He knows now he did wrong..

Why is it I think so much About this little 2 1/2 year old that I still cal my lil baby angel.. Her name is Victoria Grace Though I called her my TORI GRACE.. Her mother I also often think about. How is she? Does she live at the same place? Does she still talk to Lewis? Does she have another Boyfriend? Will she ever have a baby again? Does she think about the warnings I gave her? Does she feel alone now?? Does she now think that she is better off without My gracey baby?? Is she sad all the time or does she get sad at all?
I also think about Victoria Grandma.. Boy that woman hates me.. When Victorias mom fired me the grandma called all screamin at me.. She said I have seen Lewis play with her she loves him.. Do you know what kinda trouble you are getting yourself into. Little girl you are digging a ditch deeper than what you can get yourself out of..I saw her at out local walmart about 4 months ago..Actually I see her all the time I just decided to say hey how is your daughter..She screamed at me at the top of her lungs in walmart how dare you speak to me. Don't ever talk to me again..She said she had a lawsuit out on me for the way I acted at the gravesite (I had to remind her hey look you weren't even there Good luck on that lawsuit) . Of course all she could say was well don't you think people told me. I really acted no way I felt this child was mine they didn't bellieve she was being abused and 2 mnths later calls me and says Shes dead.. I thought I would never get over the guilt feeling.. After the funeral we went to the grave yard to bury her.. I was crying my tears endlessly flowing all i could think about was how much I loved her.. They were takin her flowers off her casket and then leaving and it killed me I didn't say it loud and I don't think anyone heard But I says They are taking Tori's flowers Tori Loved flowers.. Then i says I watched her for almost 2 years and I don't know any of these people.. She was not even buried yet and I saw her mother leaving and i says a little louder.. You can sit and watch her be abused but you can't watch her be buried.

Okay, anyways enough of that. I finally finished my letter to Lewis. Its not actually a letter because I knew not what to say so I wrote down quite a few verses that came to mind.. I do Hope that he will read it which I believe he will.. What will he think when through reading it? Will he want a relationship with God? He doesn't believe in God as Victorias mother had told me in the past.. I feel this is really what God wants me to do. I just hope I wrote all God wanted me to write. I wonder will he write back. What will he think about my letter?

So here it is

Isaiah 48:16.. Come ye unto me hear ye this, I have not spoken in secret from the beginning, from the time it was, there am I and now the Lord God, and his spirit, hath sent me

La 2:19...Arise cry out in the night in the beginning of the watches pour out thine heart like water before the face of the Lord lift up thine hands toward him for thy young children, that faint for hunger in the top of every street.

Isaiah 5:20...Woe to those who call evil good and good evil who put darkness for light and light for darkness

Psalms 34:4....... I sought the Lord and he heard me, and delivered me from all my fears

Ezekial 24:16..... You shall neither mourn nor weep nor shall yourr tears roll down

Ephesians 3:20........ god is able to do above all that we ask or think according to the power that works in us

Colossians 3:23..... Whatever ye do do it heartily as to the Lord and not to men

Hebrews 10:24-25....... Let us consdier one another..Not forsaking the assembling of ourselves together

Matthew 18:2... And Jesus called a child unto him and set him in the midst of them

Matthew 18:3.... and said, verily i say unto you except ye be converted and become as little children, ye shall not enter into the kingdom of Heaven

Matthew 18:4.... Whosoever therefore shall humble himself as this little child the same is greatest in the kingdom of Heaven

Matthew 18:5..... and whosoever shall not recieve the Kingdom of God as a little child shall not enter therin

1 Corinthians 13:11.... when I was a child i spake as a child I understood as a child but then I became a man and put away childish things

2 Timothy 3:15... and that from a child thou has known the holy scriptures which is able to make the wise unto salaton through faith that is in Jesus Christ

Acts 13:10...and said, o full of all subtility and all mischeif thou child of the devil thou enemy o all righteousness wilt thou not cease to pervert the right ways of the Lord

Matthew 5:45... That they may be the children of our father which is in heaven for he maketh his sun to rise on the evil and on the good and sendeth rain on the just and te unjust

Matthew 13:38..... The field is the world the good seed are the children of the Kingdom, but the tares are the children of the wicked one.

Mark 10:24....and the disciples were astonished at his words but Jesus answered again and saith unto them children how ard is it to trust in riches to enter the Kingdom o God

Acts 2:39... for the promise is unto you and your children and to all that are after afar off even as many as the Lord our God
shall call

Acts 3:25....Ye are the children of the prophets, and of the covenant which God made with Abraham and in thy seed shall all the Earth be blessed

Romans 8:16-17...The spirit itself beareth witness with our spirit that we are the children of God and if children, heirs, heirs with God, and joint heirs with Christ if so be we suffer with him, that we may also be glorified together

Romans 9:8... That is, they which are the children of the flesh are not the children of God, but the children of God are counted for seed

Galatians 3:26....For ye are children of God through faith in Christ Jesus

Ephesians 2:2-3...Wherein times past ye walked according to the corse of this world, according to the prince of power of the air, the spirit that now worketh in the children of disobedience amoung whom also we all had our conversation in times past in the lust of our flesh, fufilling the desires of the flesh and of mind, and were by nature the children of wrath even as others

1 John 2:1.. My little children these things I write unto that ye sin not and if any man sin we have an advocate with the father Jesus Christ the righteous

1 John 2:12..I write unto you little children because our sin are forgiven you for his names sake

1 John 2:13... I write unto you fathers because ye have known him from the beginning I write unto you young men because ye have overcome the wicked one I write unto you little children because ye have known the Father

1 John 2 :28... and now, little children abide in him, that when he shall appear, we may have confidence and not be ashamed before him at his coming

1 John 3:7 ...Little children let no man decieve you he that doeth righteous even as he is righteous

1 John 3:18... My little children let us not love in word neither in tongue but in deed and in truth

Deu 28:29....and thou shall grop at noonday as the blind grop in darkness and thou shall not prosper in thy ways and thou shall only be oppressed and spoiled evermore and no man shall save thee

Proverbs 4:19....The way of the wicked is as darkness they know not at what they stumle

ECC 2:14.....The wise mans eyes are in his head but the fool walketh in darkness and I myself perceived also on event happeneth to them all

Isaiah 29:18.... and in that day shall the deaf hear the words of the book and the eyes of the blind shall see out of the obscurity and out of darkness

Isaiah 42:7...To open the blind eyes to bring out the prisioners from the prisions and them that sit in darkness out of the prision house

Isaih 45:3....And I will give thee the treasures of darkness and hidden riches of secret places that thou mayest know that I am the Lord which call thee by name I am the Lord of Israel

Isaiah 45:7...I form the light and create darkness. I make peace and create evil. I the Lord do all these things

Isaiah 49:9....That thou mayest say to the prisioners go forth to them that are in darknes, show yourself they shall feed in the ways and their pastures shall be in all high places

Isaiah 50:10... who is amoung you that feareth the Lord that obeyeth the voice of his servent that walketh in darkness and hath no light? Let him trust in the name of the Lord and stay upon his God.

Isaiah 58:10.... and if they draw out thy soul to the hungry and satisfy the afflicted then shall thy light rise in obscurity and thy darkness be as thy noonday

Joel 2:2... a day of darkness and of gloominess, a day of clouds and of thick darkness as the mornings spread upon the mountains a great people and a strong there hath not been ever the like neither shall be anymore after it even to the years of many generations

Daniel 2:22.. He revealeth the deep and secret things he knoweth what is in darkness and the light dwelleth with them

Joel 2:31... The sun shall be turned into darkness and the moon into blood before the great and terrible day of the Lord come

Amos 4:13...For, lo, he that formeth the mountains and createth the wind and declareth unto man what is his thought that maketh the morning darkness and treadeth upon the high places of the Earth, The Lord, The God of host, is his name

Mic 7:8...Rejoice not against me o mine enemy when I fall I shall arise when I sit in darkness the Lord shall be a light unto me

Matthew 10:27.. What I tell you in darkness, that speak ye in light and what ye hear in the ear preach ye on the housetops

Luke 1:79.... To give light to them that sit in darkness and in the shadow of death to guide our feet in the ways of peace

Romans 13:12... The night is far spent the day is at hand let us therfore cast off the works of darkness and let us put on the armour of light

1 Corinthians 4:5... Therefore judge nothing before the time untill the Lord come who both will bring to light the hidden things of darkness and will make manifest the counsels of the hearts, and then shall every man have praise of God

2 Corinthians 4:6.... For God who commanded the light to shine out of the darkness hath shined in our hearts, to give the light of our knowledge of the Glory of od in the face of Jesus Christ

Ephesians 6:12....For we wrestle not against flesh and blood but against principalites against powers against the rulers of the darkness of this world against spiritual wickedness in high places

Col 1:13... who hath delivered us from the power of darkness and hath translated us into the Kingdom of his dear son

Luke 11:34... The light of the body is the eye therefore when thine eye be single thy whole body is full of light but when thine eye is evil thy whole body is full of darkness

Luke 11:35... Take heed therefore that the light which is in thee be not darkness

Luke 12:3...Therefore whatever ye have spoken in darkness shall be heard in the light and that which ye have spoken in the ear in closets shall be proclaimed om housetops

John 1:5...and the light shineth in darkness and darkness comprehended it not

John 3:19... and this is the condemnation the light is come into the world and men loved darkness rather than light because their deeds were evil

John 8:12... Then Jesus again unto them saying I am the light of the world he that followeth me shall not walk in darkness but shall have the light of life

John 12:46 I am come a light unto the world that whosoever believeth on me shall not abide in darkness

Acts 26:18....To open their eys and to turn them from darkness to light and from the power of satan unto God that they may recieve forgiveness of sins and inheritance among them which are sanctified by faith that is in me

1 John 1:5..Then this is the message which we have heard of him and declare unto you that God is light and in him is no darkness at all

1 John 1:6... If we say we have fellowship with him, and we walk in darkness, we lie, and do not the truth

Jude 1:6... and the angels which kept not their first esate but left their own habitation he hath reserved in everlasting chains under darkness unto judgement of the great day

Jude 1:13...raging waves of the sea foaming out of their own shame wandering stars to whom is reserved the blackness of darkness for ever

Revelations 16:10....and the fifth angel poured out his vial upon the seat of the beast and his kingdom was full of darkness and they gnawed their tongues for pain

Jude 1:4...For their are certain men crept in unawares who were before of old ordained to the condemnation ungodly men turning the grace of God into lasciviousness and denying the only Lord God and our Lord Jesus Christ

John 8:44...Ye are of your father the devil and te lust of your father ye will do.. He was a murderer from the beginning and abode not in the truth because there is no truth in him when he speaketh a lie he speaketh his own for he is a liar and the father of it

Matthew 13:22... He also that recieved seed among the thorns is he that heareth the word and the care of this world and the decietfulness of riches choke the word and he becometh unfruitful

Matthew 13:40... as therefore the tares are gathered and burned in the fire so shall it be the end of this world

Jer 1:5... Before I formed the in the belly I knew thee and before thou camest forth out of the womb I sanctified thee and I ordained thee a prophet unto the nations

John 15:16...Ye have not chosen me, but I have chosen you and ordained you that ye should go and bring forth fruit and that your fruit should remain that whatsoever ye shall ask of the father in my name he may give you

Romans 13:1.. Let every soul be subject unto the higher powers for there is no power but of God the powers that be ordained of God

1 Corinthians 2:7... But we speak the wisdom of God in a mystery even the hidden wisdom which God ordained before the world unto our glory

1 Corinthians 7:15... but if the unbelieving depart a brother or sister is not in bondage in such cases but God called us unto peace

Romans 16:20... and the God of peace shall bruise satan under your feet shortly The grace of our Lord Jesus Christ be with you

ECC 7:8.. better is a end of a thing than the beginning therefore and the patient in spirit is better than the proud in spirit

2 Peter 1:2... grace and peace be multiplied unto you through the knowledge of God and of Jesus our Lord

2 John 1:3 Grace be with you mercy and peace from God the Father and from the Lord Jesus Christ, the son of the Father, in truth and in Love

John 14:27...Peace I leave with you my peace I give unto you not as the world giveth give I unto you , let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid

1 John 2:24...Let that therefore which ye heard from the beginning abide in you, you also shall abide in the son, and in the father

Jer 20:17...Because he slew me not from the womb, or that my mothers might have been my grave, and her womb to always be great with me

John 11:13...howbeit Jesus spoke of his death, but they thought he had spoken of taken a rest in sleep

1 Corinthians 15:51...behold I shew you a mystery we shall not all sleep but we shall all be changed

1 Timothy 4:14... If we believe Jesus died and rose again, even so them also which sleep in Jesus will God bring with him

Matthew 13:19..When anyone heareth the word of the kingdom and understand it not, then cometh the wicked one and catcheth away that which was sown in his heart this is he which recieved seed by the wayside..

Mark 4:15...And these are the by the wayside, where the word is sown, but ehen they heard satan cometh immediatly, and taketh away the word that was sown in their hearts

Acts 22:14...and he said, the Lord of our fathers hath chosen thee, that thou shouldest know his will, and see that just one,
and shouldest hear the voice of his mouth

Hope Willingham ~ Babygirls_babydolls ~ " Two men stand in prison bars, one sees mudd the ot