Reading Boobear's journal

Dec 08, 2004 04:33 # 29877

Boobear * wants to know...

Why do men have to be so mean?

Why is it that men must be assholes? Seriously, its a question i've always wanted answered. They feel the need to treat you as if you are an insignifigant pest who should only be around when they want something. Time and again its the same thing. It must be me, otherwise it wouldn't happen with every man i've been with. If they'd give me some kind of insight into what the hell they actually want from me then maybe I could fix things. It isn't as though I hang around constantly and always want attention. I do like to speak with him at least once a day just to touch base and see how hes doing? Is that wrong? You wouldn't think so. Things are fine one minute and then out of the blue, i'm ignored, slighted, and it kills me because I can't figure out why. If i'm doing something to piss him off the least he could do is have the courtesy to tell me what I did instead of leaving me out in the cold so to speak. Wondering what the hell I did this time and trying to figure out how I can fix shit when I don't even know what it is i'm trying to fix. Do men actually realize they do this? Is it some kind of club thing they're all involved in? "hey lets treat our girlfriends like shit today just so they start to doubt themselves and wonder what they did wrong." Do they just want to mess with our heads? I'm seriously beginning to wonder.

~*~Never argue with an idiot, they'll bring you down to their level...then win because of experience

Dec 09, 2004 02:23 # 29899

kylebellamy *** replies...

Re: Why do men have to be so mean?

?% | 1

A zen thought in answer to your question:

When you must ask a question, consider that you may already have the answer.

In other words, it is my long standing belief that the term "men" is a widly mis-applied label that is used to denote a gender or a reached age. In fact, I think the word should be reserved for the males who actually know how to be kind or strong when needed.

The so called "men" of this world are merely boys who inhabit the bodies of grown humans. I would say that the boys who have treated you so unfaily should never have the label of a man. Honor, dignity and personal strength are the markers of a true man.

I apologise if this sounds a bit harsh in tone but I am constantly offended by comments of "men do this" and "men do that" when the truth is that I try to hold myself to an ideal that is not followed by the majority of the males of this planet. I am not perfect and I do not claim to be, but I will not placed in the same catagory as those cretins that pretend to be grown up.

So let's call them by the name they really deserve: childish assholes. But don't call them men. A man is the sum of his actions.

I know I'm dead on the surface But I'm screaming underneath

This post was edited by kylebellamy on Dec 09, 2004.

Dec 11, 2004 06:21 # 29980

Boobear * replies...

Re: Why do men have to be so mean?

Ok, I amend my statement. You're right. It's not all men who act this way and I was wrong to generalize that so badly, but given my mindstate at the time of the post it's excusable. I do know several men who are truely deserve that label, altho the ones I know are of course taken by close friends and family. I'm simply tired of being considered a playtoy to the "boys" of todays society. My appologies if I did offend any true man who has the decency to treat women with the respect they deserve.

~*~Never argue with an idiot, they'll bring you down to their level...then win because of experience

Dec 13, 2004 13:52 # 30028

kylebellamy *** replies...

Re: Why do men have to be so mean?

Oh no, I wasn't chastizing or anything, just giving my opinion and in a way, agreeing with your opinion. lol The problem with typing everything is there's no way to convey mood. lol

I know I'm dead on the surface But I'm screaming underneath

Dec 15, 2004 03:17 # 30086

Boobear * replies...

Re: Why do men have to be so mean?

Oh, ok lol....thank you :)It is nice to know that there are some decent ones out there...even if they're harder to find.

~*~Never argue with an idiot, they'll bring you down to their level...then win because of experience

Dec 16, 2004 13:36 # 30148

kylebellamy *** replies...

Re: Why do men have to be so mean?

?% | 1

I find that the biggest problem with being decent and being found is that usually, and I mean it in a general sense as there are always exceptions, women go for the Collin Farrel type. Dark, brooding and generally not nice.

The problem is that we of the lesser testosterone infused end up being overlooked because we don't have that raw attitude that makes the bad boys so attractive. I wish I understood that one but some things will forever remain a mystery. lol

I know I'm dead on the surface But I'm screaming underneath

Dec 27, 2004 19:19 # 30547

Boobear * replies...

Ok so that's a little true...

49% | 2

I will admit you're correct on that somewhat. I myself don't usually go for the dark, brooding, mean type. I prefer a funny, easygoing, sweet guy. Hard to find...yes. lol My current b/f is actually someone I never pictured myself with. I myself am not absolutely amazing looking. I would define myself as "cute". He is more the "sexy as hell" type and it makes it hard to picture a future together when I look at his usual dating pattern. Altho he can be the sweetest man ever, there are times when I feel slighted or hurt by things he does. I can't honestly say he does them on purpose but he does them never the less. Hence the original topic of this journal. A small rant. I guess it could be that I take things way too personally, which I admit about myself. No use trying to pretend otherwise, that would be useless and an utter lie. Anyhow lol, now that i've spouted about useless stuff i'm off too read about other peoples interesting lives.

~*~Never argue with an idiot, they'll bring you down to their level...then win because of experience

Jan 01, 2005 10:03 # 30689

Stoic_Slaughter *** replies...

Don't lose hope!

?% | 1

Are you best friends with your current boyfriend? It's a good foundation to have before building a relationship. Do you tell him when little things bother you? (You should.) You can easily find Mr. Right, by the way. Most women don't understand that. All it takes is patience. You should never feel insecure in any way, because I can assure you that you are a beautiful person who deserves the best in life.

Keep your chin up.

For my next trick, I shall make you all disappear.

Jan 02, 2005 04:59 # 30724

Boobear * replies...

Thank you for your response...

Actually that's the funny part. We used to tell eachother literally everything. We were the best of friends before we started seeing eachother, and even though we still are, I can't help but remember how he was with other women he's dated. He used to be the player type. I can't help but wonder if I set myself up for the same thing they went through when dating him. I love him to death and i'd hate to lose him. I trusted him implicitly until this weekend when I found out he met up with a girl he met online. I don't know if anything happened, I haven't seen him in about 3 days. I intend to talk to him when I get the chance again, but his attitude's changed toward me recently and I guess that makes me wary. Thank you for your response Stoic, and btw, I read some of your poetry. Impressive. I'm especially enamored of the trust/deception poem.

~*~Never argue with an idiot, they'll bring you down to their level...then win because of experience


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