Reading Poetry

Jan 15, 2005 23:20 # 31364

Bunk *** has a suggestion...

The Pantoum

98% | 4

The Pantoum is a really cool style of poetry that I was introduced to at a recent writing class session. I guess part of the story is, out teacher (not so much a teacher though, more like a guide... she can't control us ;)) went to a writers retreat in Banff, got a whole bunch of ideas and now is trying them on us.

Anyway, the Pantoum is made up of a total of twelve lines, arranged in the following pattern: six four line stanzas, no metric or rhyming scheme, but you use the second and forth lines of the first stanza as the first and third lines of the next one. You continue this pattern all the way through, and then in the last stanza you use the first and third lines of the first stanza as your second and forth lines.

She explained all this, and then gave us some time to try it out. Here's what I came up with (this should make the pattern a bit clearer):

(untitled)

I heard the call
For able men
This time to kill
The Beast

For able men
A cause to find
The Beast
That stands beyond the line

A cause to find
Me, lost in the hell
That stands beyond the line
Of reasonable thought

Me, lost in the hell
I forget the memory
Of reasonable thought
And become an animal

I forget the memory
And how it began to end
And become an animal
The message they sold

And how it began to end
I heard the call
The message they sold
This time to kill

I like the way everything has to fit, the circular style, and the way it closes together in the end. Everyone in my class seemed to do pretty well, although it gets tricky trying to finish it off. Anyway, it's a lot of fun to write. Try it out!

But I can't find no place or nothin', where thrills are cheap, and love is divine

Jan 24, 2005 20:34 # 31867

harold_maude *** replies...

I'm not quite sure I've got it..

?% | 1

Interesting way to write a poem. I'd like to have a go at it, but I think I'm going to need to write the specifics of how it works and muddle on through.

I liked the poem you came up with. Very visual and, how do I discribe this, a feeling of the shock of death and being in the middle of it and being awake inspite of the sock of death.
I don't know if that makes any sense or not.

It only looks that way because your standing on your head.

Jan 24, 2005 22:24 # 31876

WaStEdYoUtH *** replies...

Re: I'm not quite sure I've got it..

?% | 2

This does wrap together rather well in the end, and a very interesting way of writing that I haven't seen.
I also enjoy the sense of the hunt for a desired end, or for the self...very good.

A lack of preparation on your part, does not constitute an emergency on mine.

Jan 24, 2005 22:45 # 31879

Bunk *** replies...

Re: I'm not quite sure I've got it..

?% | 1

The pattern by numbers is like this:

1
2
3
4

2
5
4
6

5
7
6
8

7
9
8
10

9
11
10
12

11
1
12
3

One of my peers said that my poem seemed reminiscent of Apocalypse Now... thinking further on it, there are similar themes, including the sudden immersion in death...

But I can't find no place or nothin', where thrills are cheap, and love is divine

This post was edited by Bunk on Jan 24, 2005.

Jan 25, 2005 12:17 # 31943

rosyxxx *** replies...

Re: Writing pantoums...

Back in the day... I wrote a pantoum, and committed it here to "What Sucks!" It is somewhere in the archives... I shall go and find it... I think it was one of my best poems, and I wrote it in response to plagiarism of my work. *smiles darkly*

It is called: Pantoum of a Room (or a little bird told me). I would type it out again, because I type really fast, but then that would be duplicating a post, and would run counter to the NAO posting guidelines. :)

I haven't written any pantoums lately, but after having just recently written another poem in the 'mocking style' of Marilyn Chin... that mimicks the ancient Chinese fu form, in a more modern variation...I am catching my breath for a minute. Her poem was the same title of her book: Rhapsody in Plain Yellow. I'd been reading it again, and getting inspired by her poetry...

But, now, I shall again try to try my hand at a pantoum... although the last one I wrote, I really savour with mischief...

Here it is... click on this -> post #26396.

If mountain goats like living at high elevations, why do none live in high rise apartment buildings?

This post was edited by rosyxxx on Jan 25, 2005.


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