Reading zen's journal

Been really busy working at two full time jobs, and taking a class in Modern Philosophies. I'm exploring the idea of identity. So, now that the class is over for the summer, I might share my views on identitys.

First, I'm working full time at a national department store with an automotive department. I stock tires and batteries. It pays shitty, and batteries are very heavy. Tires get to be heavy after moving say, 240 in a day.

One of the cool things about my job is that it's fairly physically demanding. There's three tiers or shelves, and they get stacked 6 or 7, or 5 high depending on the size. Truck and hugefuckingperformance tires get stacked five high in the cave. But up on the top there's more room, so my partner jon gets up there and I pitch them up to him. It's probably a good 10 maybe 12 feet that I can lob them up to him.

This is important not to toot my own horn, and say I'm big. But what it is I look at it as training for The Highland Games.
Here, The Games are a social/cultural/ethnic celebration for Scotts, English, Welsh, Celtic, Irish, Gaelic folk. It's part of my tradition, and social identity.
These Highland Games take place a number of times a year at different locations. On Sept 23-25 this year, at Hopkinton State Fairgrounds. After the professionals do their games, they all ameteurs the opportunity to try the events. I like doing the ameteur ones.

Now, oh, before I forget, this entry is about my identity as a professional, or on a porofessional level. This is how those around me every day perceive me. I'm a tire jocky. Who has 17" arms, and weighs 272#. That's down from 302# that I was at working for the restaurant. So losing the fat and gaining muscle is a great side benefit to the job. Quite honestly, I love that part of it. It's like working at a gym for 5 to 7 hours a day. 4 of those days require the most strenuous lifting and running.

But the pay is lousey. I don't make commission, although that may or may not change. I don't sell much, but, well, I'm not on commission--a viscious circle. I could, definitely go across to being a salesman without any problems. But that means dealing with customers, a definite minus.
In this bastardized position, I have the opportunity of selling, without having to listen to as much of the complaints. A definite plus.

But the problem is that I'm still a support, not a sales; i.e. sucky pay.
And there's the societal-thing, of how I'm looked at, and identified by society.

I'll bet that just took 5 years off my life--but GODDAMM if it wasn't worth every second