Reading Funny Stuff

Yesterday, I went to the doc. Round about noon, after driving for 35 min., I got there. My chest x-ray was at 12:30, and my office visit upstairs was at 1:30. About 2 pm they ushered me into a room. At 3:05, the doctor still wasn't there. So, being very tired, I layed down on the examing table for a nap.

When the doc came in, I fell off the table. He didn't laugh, but it would have been even funnier if he did! I scraped my pinkie toe, and my pride was bruised. But nothing else really.

Okay, that's not so funny, maybe. But here's another story that is...

The Mashed Potato Story

I was at work last week. People were fighting. It was miserable. And then, when work was over I walked out to my car. The valet started to tell me that something was wrong with my car. I said, "Ya know, I don't believe anything that you are about to say, cause you tell girls tall fibs like that all the time. It's funny, but I know you aren't telling me the truth."

He kept saying: "No! Seriously..." I shook my head, smiling. Then we came to my car. *silence*

It was covered in mashed potato. Any other day, if the day had been good, I would have sighed and rolled my eyes, and said: "What the fuck?!" But that day, the world was falling apart, and I started laughing hysterically. I grabbed the valet guy to hold myself up. He looked at me like I was completely nuts. When I caught my breath, I said: "Here! Here...is the comic relief for the day. My car is covered in mashed potatoes, and I've been making fun of my stalker by calling him Mr. Potato Head, and posting posts online about the new Darth Tater from Hasbro. This is choice. I love it. How much funnier can it get?"

If that's not the Supreme Consciousness making a joke, and poking fun, then...

He kept apologizing. He tried to take his shirt off to wipe it off, and I kept saying: "No man, don't do that...", while thinking I really didn't want to see his fifty-pound overweight belly. But he took it off, gave me a hug, naked and hairy, and began to wipe the mashed potatoes off my car. He said his friend had been outside that night, and had a potato gun.

For those of you that don't know, cause I didn't, a 'potato gun' is for shooting off baked potatoes. O_O. It hit my car. Nuff said.

Managment wasn't too happy with him. They didn't see the humor in it, but it was my car! If it was a crime to hit cars with potatoes, I still wouldn't press charges...it was too damn fuckin' funny!!!!

I am laughing my ass of still. I forgot that happened. And yes, I did wash it off. Before some nut could put gravy on it. Though...I think I should add that mashed potatoes and gravy are one of my favorite foods. I used to order it for 'dessert' when I was little. Heh.

My mind is made up...not like my bed, which is a mess.

<insert pun here>

Interesting story. Glad you shared it with us, but I can't say I would have laughed to find my car covered with mashed potatoes needless to say. The stench alone would cause my eyes to swell up with tears, much less the thought of the time it takes to clean the car.

If the world should blow itself up,the last audible voice would be an expert saying it can't be done

Hey Hawkeye! Incidentally, it didn't really take much time to get my car cleaned of the mashed potatoes...especially after the big, hairy valet guy wiped off most of it with his t-shirt...subjecting me to the visuals of his big hair belly leaning over my car. Um.

The whole situation was literally: food for thought. Heh. <bad pun, I know>

My mind is made up...not like my bed, which is a mess.