Reading What Sucks

I found myself unable to experience love, since i'm so f*ed up. I have a girlfriend for ~4years now. And she is okay with that, i suppose.

On the other hand i feel like a total bastard being unable to experience the most complex emotions. :/

"Life is a queue. You come in, hang around for a bit, get some service, then depart."

Can a guy really carry on a relationship (mostly sexual) with a girl for two years if he does not feel anything for her?

you almost answered your question. if it's mostly sexual, it's a physical "relationship."
You gals who get tangled with a married man should be ashamed of yourself. Not because I think it's morally wrong, or some crap like that, but because you always go into these things with unreal, and unreasonable expectations.
If I've seen it once, I've seen it 100 times on this very site, women who lament the loss of a relationship with a guy who's emotionally unavailable, and she just can't accept the situation. She thinks that he'll pick her over the wife.
Sometime, it does happen, most times it don't. An affair is exactly that, a short-time happening.
He doesn't feel the same way about you as time goes on, but still you believe his lies.
Newsflash: the guy will string you along for as long as you let him.
If things haven't gotten better in 2 years, how much longer do you think it'll be before they improve--do you want to wait another 10 years, hoping it'll get better?

Stay with him, or not. It's your choice. Ultimately, you get what you deserve. But don't go crying to anyone else when it doesn't match up to your hopes.

The Cranesbill--a surprising pick by Emmet.

Zen,
Thank you

Quote from zen's post
"Can a guy really carry on a relationship (mostly sexual) with a girl for two years if he does not feel anything for her?

you almost answered your question. if it's mostly sexual, it's a physical "relationship."
You gals who get tangled with a married man should be ashamed of yourself. Not because I think it's morally wrong, or some crap like that, but because you always go into these things with unreal, and unreasonable expectations.
If I've seen it once, I've seen it 100 times on this very site, women who lament the loss of a relationship with a guy who's emotionally unavailable, and she just can't accept the situation. She thinks that he'll pick her over the wife.
Sometime, it does happen, most times it don't. An affair is exactly that, a short-time happening.
He doesn't feel the same way about you as time goes on, but still you believe his lies.
Newsflash: the guy will string you along for as long as you let him.
If things haven't gotten better in 2 years, how much longer do you think it'll be before they improve--do you want to wait another 10 years, hoping it'll get better?

Stay with him, or not. It's your choice. Ultimately, you get what you deserve. But don't go crying to anyone else when it doesn't match up to your hopes. "

QUOTE: "...Can a guy really carry on a relationship (mostly sexual) with a girl for two years if he does not feel anything for her? Keep in mind that he is married and I love him more than anything..."

Ok, I don't have all the answers on this issue, but I can tell You about my own experience. I am a married man, and I am with another girl for almost six yrs by now. And....I love her. I do, very much. And she loves me even more, as she use to say. I have never made any promise to her. I am what I am. If I just could turn back the time, and meet her earlier then I met my wife...
I don't think that he does not feel anything for you. He must feel something. That justifies his efforts to be with you for two yrs. And, for a married man, it is an certain effort.
However, it's a very beautifull relationship and it sucks at the same time. I know

Thanks for the awesome post. This topic has received a lot of mixed explanations. One question for you though...do you ever feel guilty and shy away from the gf for a while. The thing with me is there are times that he is really distant and moody, but then he will call me and everything seems to back to the way it was. But, your right it is wonderful and amazing, but then there are times it really sucks and I think those are the times where we both think we want out of it.

Hi. I have been out of town this month and away from the most urban things. It is my first working day after the holidays.
You ask me if I ever feel guilty. Well, maybe sometimes I do think that I am holding her life on a dead point. She loves me and she can't be with somebody else. Not that I am possessive, becouse I have never made her any promises and lies about my status. Now, she is with someone. She tries to put her life together, and I'm helping her as much as I can. I know the guy, he loves her very much. But, something is missing... She can't focus on her new and promissing relationship. My shaddow is always there, and seems to cause very cold heart. We also tried to get out of it, several times. It was impossible. We will never stop to love each other.

I'd count your losses and move on. Some guys stay in a relationship for the free RIDE. You deserve better for yourself. It sounds to me like once he finds someone else he will move on anyway. If he really loved you, he would be doing all in his power to make your relationship work. I'm no perfect male, but to romance a woman, single or married is the most precious thing a relationship has to offer.

I agree!

Hi, i was wondering if you're still in this situation. i too am involved with a married man, except i have been with him for four years and constantly am fighting between my head and heart on his "feelings" for me. i would LOVE to be able to speak with someone who is in the same situation as me. BTW - i'm also married, and we have been "caught" several times, and yet the other man refuses to get out of my life...i keep trying to push him away and he won't go.

I would say its the Saddest thing on earth when you love someone , sometimes even more than yourself but then you never get loved back. But then its how things are .. everything changes with time and so does people. You cant make them stick to you or remain the way they use to be in past. The only solution i guess is to move on and hope you'll find someone better.

The most disappointing part is some people practice the art of keeping their options option , they wont tell you the truth unless it becomes so important that your life depends on it. In my opinion everyone deserves to know the truth , I only wish the other person could at least share his/her unbiased views ; makes it lot easier to hear the truth rather than wondering what could be true.

Intimacy is a four syllable word for, "Here's my heart and soul, please grind them into hamburger, and enjoy.""- Meredith Grey (Greys Anatomy)