Reading Funny Stuff

Ah, the joys of being a cashier. While I willingly admit that the job is absolutely horrible it does have it's high points. One of those high points is getting a customer that really doesn't like you and then using them for your own amusement. That's right folks, having fun at the customer's expense.

One day I was at my register having a happy crappy time when the manager of the Subway restaurant that's built into our Wal-Mart decided to come through my line. All was going well till he wanted cash back from his debit purchase and decided that his twenty dollars had to be broken up. Normally on an express lane this isn't so bad, however I was running rather low on change. He had wanted a ten, a five, and five ones. I informed him that I had not a single ten and was rather low on ones. This then prompted him to want four fives. To get him out of my way I went ahead and did it. What set him off is that I muttered to myself about not really having enough fives either. When I handed him his change and receipt he informed me that I "didn't have to get an attitude about it" and told one of the CSMs (who doesn't really care too much about superfluous complaints) that I was rude. I only know this now because a friend told me she saw the complaining take place. This one incident has lead to another round of sheer amusement.

Two days ago I had another run in with the Subway Manager (who's name I do not know). I had just returned from my break and as per usual I stood and bullshitted with the CSM for a few minutes. Eventually he got around to assigning me a register. Register number one, to relieve a girl for her break and there he was. He was next in line, with his twelve pack of water and twelve pack of cola on the table. A loaf of bread, some chips, and a CD accompanied it. The look on his face was one of utter contempt. He knew that he would have to deal with me, and I was more than ready for him.

The transaction, like many before it had started out so well. I went through the standard small talk of being a cashier and the scanning of the items happened without any difficulty at all. Aside from him giving me that angry vally girl stare. I bagged the chips, the CD, and the bread in one bag as they are all items one does not to crush. Manager then huffed, "I want the bread in a separate bag."

No please, no politeness at all. I picked that bitch up by the plastic tail and plopped it into it's own bag. I then proceeded to put his heavy items on the triangular metal platform of the bag carousel and informed him of his total. The look he had on his face was somewhere between, 'oh no girl you did not' and 'you're an idiot' he pointed at the shopping cart he'd moved over to the side of the bags and told me "The shopping cart is right there."

For a moment I felt he was going to rest a hand on his hip and wag his finger. I looked him dead in the eye with a smile that screamed 'asshole!' and told him, "Yeah... it is."

He didn't quite believe what I just said. It was obvious in the indignant look he had on his face that he wasn't expecting me to confirm his assessment of the position of the shopping cart. His indignation came to head not but a moment later when he shouted, "Well then, I just don't want any of it!"

He stormed off on that high note and I had to tell the customer I needed a moment to void off this guy's transaction and move on. Of all the shitty customer's I've had in the months since I gained employment at Wal-Mart, this guy has to be my favorite. I look forward to when the day comes that we have yet another battle in our slowly forming war. Thus far, I am the winner and I confidently say that I shall remain so.

--Jami

You fail it.

Props to a fellow retail worker... retail sucks, but sometimes, you can surprise the bastards. ;)

At the Costco where I worked (until two days ago... they'll want me back eventually), the customers are too stupid to even put up a fight. One day a guy drove right up to the front of the store, rolled down his window and asked me, "Is this the Home Depot?"

But I can't find no place or nothin', where thrills are cheap, and love is divine

Most of my customers are angry middle aged house wives who's kids are old enough to not really need them around anymore so they come to Wal-Mart to vent their frustrations while their husbands are out "running errands" with their secretaries. That I suppose is the downside to working at a Wal-Mart that's surrounded by $200-300 thousand dollar homes.

However, they are patheticly stupid most of the time. I've had questions like, "Do I really have to go to Laway to put things in Layaway?"

Oh well, at least I'll have more amusing stories to post here on NAO.

You fail it.