Reading harold_maude's journal

This morning, Saturday March 15, 2008, is something that comes today. Not tomorrow, not all the days before it.
Just today.

When you think about it, there are some pretty amazing things about that truth. The only day of it's kind in human history, time bends to this day and stays here until 12:00 midnight and at 12:01 it will be another unique day in human history.

So, here I am, just as everyone else is in this unique once in a life time place. Pretty awesome. An event that will occur only here only now.
Each minuet that passes into the annals of history, a minuet that becomes forever after just a memory, is now.

But what if time is something other than just what we are preciving it to be? That is the question that has driven my thoughts about time for a very long time. :)

We are just sojourners, very often without realizing that we are.
We are only temporary visiters to this place.
We do not remain the same person either physically, or any other way your beliefs have settled for you or posed as the truth.
What ever they may be, it doesn't change the fact that we are just passing this way. And today is something that won't be here again.
After now it just becomes fact, history, something to be forgotten or remembered, depending on how impacting the events are that collide with you on the road forward.

We are the magical mystery tour of humantity. All of us. The odd duck if you believe we are the only senient beings that exist and are able to make choice and do according to our choice.
If you believe we are not alone, we may not be able to precive the others that exist with us in this universe, than you may have at some point wondered what all the different perceptions that every other being is having about us.

Sometimes I wonder if we are just like them in more ways than our bounderies and comfort zones will allow us to accept as truth.
I wonder about that stuff. Maybe the reason why I spend so much time thinking, because all these strange what if's and why not's keep showing up and messing with my head.
I don't often think about the past anymore, in fact sometimes I have trouble remembering the past.
I know that is existed, and things happened, but living there is not what I want, so I would make a guess and say the reason this stuff can find a voice in my head is because there is room for it in my head.

This morning I was working on a new sculpture, putting the peices together that will be covered in paper mache and then painted and then sealed, this stuff takes time to get done because of the drying and curing time in between each new layer of paper or color or sealant, so there is time to ponder while playing with the stuff.
And this morning as I was doing that, I was thinking about yesterday and all the events that led up to what happened, and I did remember something he said a few weeks ago, that it was hard for him to leave once he got here.
This place for everyone who comes here, ends up being a place where they can just let go and really and truely relax.
It happened to him too, but he just wouldn't go home when the need to lay down and just go to sleep hit him.

I see the same thing with everyone who comes here, they come in stressed or angry or sad and in just a little while, they start yawning. It gets contagous. After a bit, they need to go home and get some sleep.
And they sleep well and peaceful when they leave here.
I think he was getting addicted to it.

I thought about everything that's happenen since the first of the year. The loss of another friend, he left his body because it was his time to.
All the people who came to work where I do and failed and fell apart and left, in a very short amount of time.
The other friends I have that are falling apart and doing stupid things now, things based completely on emotions that are going to end up costing them things that maybe arn't so good to loose.
The changes at work, which have been numerous since the beginning of the year, and the state of exaustion that everyone seems to be suffering under.
I can't do anything about any of that. I can't take back anything or stop the series of events that follow other events.

They are now just encapsulated moments of history.
Just like this will be when I post it.

It only looks that way because your standing on your head.